学进去

People are often surprised by my fear of blood and needles. Working in a public health unit, I probably have more daily interaction with syringes (注射器) than the average person. But the truth is, having my blood drawn scares me.

When I was 9, I had an extremely high temperature. A nurse rudely stuck the needle into my arm, causing a sharp pain. I avoided having blood taken from my body for the next years. A few months before I turned 30, my doctor ordered a blood test as part of my physical exam. I panicked. Sensing my fear, she gently suggested I see a psychiatrist (精神科医生). “Dr. M helped my other patients with the same fear,” she said.

When Dr. M called to set up an appointment, I hesitated. Talking about personal problems to a medically licensed stranger was uncommon in my family. “A psychiatrist?” Mother asked. “He’ll just put you on drugs. Can’t you get over this yourself?” I almost listened. But I went to Dr. M’s clinic finally. “Phobias (恐惧症) are pretty easy to treat,” he said. I wasn’t convinced of his words. But despite my doubts, I was running out of options.

We started with basic exposure treatment. I watched videos of blood being drawn every day. As I started to feel more at ease with needles, Dr. M suggested drawing blood. As he gently pressed the needle into my flesh, I felt dizzy and breathed deeply. After a few minutes, I looked at the needle. It wasn’t so bad. I didn’t pass out. “You’re doing well,” Dr. M said.

I still find it unpleasant getting blood drawn, but thanks to several months of treatment, I’m less scared. I hate to admit it, but Dr. M is right — phobias can be treated. Sometimes, we have to leave our comfort zone and face our fears. And this can lead to freedom in the end.