学进去

Have you ever wondered why other people don’t see things the same way you do? Isn’t it confusing that you don’t necessarily share the same viewpoints even when you come from the same family? Why can’t they just see it my way? The scientific explanation comes from cognitive (认知的) psychology; it’s a mental process known as information processing.

From a psychological perspective, you have your own internal set of core values, memories, and quality of emotion. With every external event you experience, the information comes in and is filtered (过滤) through your emotions, memories, and values. How you “see” yourself, others, and the world you live in will be flavored by what you’ve experienced or believe to be true. In other words, you don’t see things as they are — you see things as you are.

You have a process for filtering information and it may strike you as being odd, to say the least, when others don’t subscribe to the same beliefs, thoughts, and opinions. What if you considered, even for just a moment, that what you are perceiving is only one possibility — and that there are several other ways to interpret a situation?

In every walk of life, you find yourself defending your beliefs, arguing for how you remember something that happened, and positioning yourself to influence others to see things your way. But what if you’re missing the important point that your differences are what make life colorful? Those differences are what stimulate your mind and emotions. Without differences, life would be dull. There would be no “aha” moment if you knew everything. There would be no inspiration in the form of art, music, poetry, style, or communication.

There will be times in your life when boundaries may need to be enforced with others and, at the end of the day, you want to feel understood and appreciated. Learning to honor your viewpoints, while others have their own is vital for coexisting in a world where every individual is perfectly unique.